Surgery complete and Kristin in recovery!

Just met with Kristin's surgeon. According to him the procedure went very well and she is doing great.

The doctor said that as soon as they looked in they could see the portion of her brain that had descended below her skull. He removed a small portion of her skull at the base near her neck and said that they immediatly saw a reduction in the pressure on her brain. Because the brain had reached her spinal column, the doctor also removed her C-1 vertebrae (the topmost on your spine; see pic in this post).

This is an extremely positive result. We always knew that a small piece of skull would be removed and that the C-1 vertebrae would have to go. However, depending on what they found, it was possible that her C-2 vertebrae would have to be removed and/or that they would have to make an incision in the tonsils of her brain (the portion that had descended) in order to fully relieve the pressure. The fact they did not have to do that made the procedure more simple and likely will make Kristin's recovery that much easier.

Kristin is in the ICU recovery room and is awake and alert. We won't be able to see her for an hour or two. While I wish I could run in to see her right now, its enough to know she is doing well. :)

Mike

Closing up!

Just got another update from the O/R: they are closing the incision and will be done soon. Thank goodness....

Mike

Half-way home...

We just received an update from the O/R. The surgery is going "very well" and is about half-complete. :)

Mike

Under way...

Kristin has been moved from the surgical holding area to the O/R as I write this. I drove her and Kerry to the hospital this morning, and Aunt Betty, Kerry and I were all with her as she had her vitals checked, gave some blood, and donned her patient's gown.

Kristin is in excellent spirits - she was joking about how nice her gown looks on her and how much she enjoyed shoving her hair under her standard- issue blue surgical cap. Her blood pressure was pretty low (90/70), which gave us all a nice, light moment to ponder whether anything whatsoever bothers her. :)

About 30 minutes ago the three of us each kissed and hugged Kristin "goodbye" as she departed with her nurse (a very nice lady) for the surgical holding area. She had a smile on her face and appeared to be very calm.

Meanwhile, Betty, Kerry and I have taken a seat amongst a dozen or so others here in the surgical waiting lounge. As hospitals go it is very pleasant here. The lounge is lofted above a nice lobby where there is a player piano and a waterfall. There's a flatscreen t.v. displaying a surgical "scoreboard" where we can monitor Kristin's progress via her patient number.

When the surgery is complete we will be visited by the surgeon and Kristin will be wheeled into the recovery area, where she is expected to stay for one hour. After that she will be moved to "her" room.

I will post an update as soon as I can after the surgery is complete. Thanks to all for continuing to follow and sending your positive thoughts and love Kristin's way.

Mike

1 Day Out

I kind of thought I'd be freaking out more right about now. Ok, I totally was yesterday (just ask Reagan and Charlie's dad Bill who so graciously let me off the hook from our "strongly encouraged" parent swim timer class so I could spend the evening with the kids), and then again this morning, but now that I've done everything I wanted to do, I'm ready. You're probably wondering, what does one do the day before having brain surgery? Well, for me, I'm spending it with my family and Mike & his kids (who I also consider my family).

Also, the part of me that is definitely my mother, is getting my house ready for my return home. I'm doing all my laundry, putting clean sheets on my bed, cleaning my house, etc...I just think that coming home to a clean, peaceful house will be conducive to my recovery. I try not to think about the fact that my mom did all this on 8/12/07 and didn't actually come home for a year and a half. I plan to be home by Thursday, Friday at the very latest (deep breath).

They told me to pack a small bag. Reagan just asked me why do I need to pack a bag, don't they give me those gowns to sleep in? I really hate those hospital gowns, but she's right. I seriously have no clue what to bring besides deodorant and a toothbrush. I've only done this when I went to have the kids, and that was so much more exciting, plus packing the diaper bag was thrilling because you knew that you were FINALLY going to get to use those tiny clothes and things you got at your shower. Anyway, this time is completely different. I'm bringing like 5 books; I love to read and have no idea what I may be in the mood for, but I really hope I'm not fooling myself. What if I'm in so much pain that they have me drugged up and I'm sleeping for 4 or 5 days? Ugh, the thought of that makes me cringe. I realize I'm not heading out to a hotel for a vacation here, but to sit in some room for days...what does one do to pass the time? My aunt is bringing me magazines, that will probably be easier on the eyes as I'm guessing that brain surgery leaves you with quite a headache. Mike is giving me an iPod that he put a bunch of relaxing music on, which will be really helpful in drowning out the sounds of the hospital.

So tonight I'm going to hang out with Mike and my sister. They will definitely do a great job entertaining me and keeping my mind from going to dark places. They are great company and I'm so thankful that I have them to get me through what could be one of the most difficult nights of my life as far as the anticipation of the actual surgery in the morning. They have amazingly funny, witty, intelligent senses of humor that are sure to keep me smiling and laughing all evening. I'm sure at times that laghter will turn to tears, for all of us, but there's no place I would rather be.

Ok, I just realized that since I'll be leaving, the kids are getting picked up in a few hours. I'm NOT ready to say good bye to them, and I've gone back to complete freak out mode. I'm going to have to take a break from this to go hug them and come back...

Yeah, there's just no getting rid of this pit in my stomach. Ugh, this is going to be the hardest part. I know it's not good bye, just see you soon, but still...


Anyway...

I'll be praying for Mike and Kerry and my aunt Betty tomorrow as they sit in the waiting room during my surgery. We'll be at Evanston Hospital, and I'm scheduled to be in surgery from 7:30 to 12:30. That's quite a wait for them, and I'm glad they have each other for support and entertainment for those long 5 hours. They will keep my dad and other family members & friends informed, which I know isn't always easy either.

Bill and I decided that the kids won't come to the hospital until I'm out of ICU and alert enough for them to visit. Rest is the most important thing in the first few days after brain surgery (thank you Laurie), and we also don't want to upset them. It's not going to be easy for him Monday and Tuesday as they wait, ask questions, and beg to go visit me. My aunt will keep in contact with him regularly so he always knows what is going on. Starting tomorrow and indefinitely, he'll be juggling the kids and all of their activities and his job as well. I suggested to have them take a break from their sports this summer, or maybe even just Reagan's swimming since she practices everyday at 7:45 a.m., but he insisted that it's important to them and they love their sports, so he would make it work until I'm feeling better. He's a great dad.

As for me, I'll get there tomorrow morning at 6, "fall asleep" around 7:30, and wake up sometime around 1 I'm guessing, as thought only a few minutes have passed. I cannot wrap my head around this because I know what is actually going to happen during those "few minutes" that are actually 5 hours. Regardless, I'm very lucky that when I wake up, I'll have Mike, Kerry and my aunt there for me, to support me and be there for me no matter what my recovery has in store.


FYI...For those of you who have asked, Mike has the login info for the Blog, so he'll update it. Thanks so much for all of your support! I'll be in touch when it's all done and I can type again :)

Reagan

Many people have asked me how Reagan is handling all of this. I have been meaning to write this blog for a while now, and I've tried to, but it's hard to write. Reagan is a really special kid. As a parent of a gifted learner, I've learned that one of the differences between her and an advanced learner is the way she internalizes information; she develops very strong feelings about what she learns. For example, when she learned about the oil spill, not only did she grasp the information and understand what was happening, she became devastated about the effects of the contamination. She once came across the word "slum" on a spelling list of "sl" words and wanted to know what it meant. So we went on her laptop and looked on Wikepedia and looked at some google images. When I explained about third world countries to her, she was astounded. She wanted to know what she could do, and I explained that we aren't a third world country, but we do have less fortunate people, so she went straight to her closet and began pulling out everything that doesn't fit and that she doesn't wear to put in a bag to donate to the poor, and she still does so on a regular basis. When her school did a food drive, she cleaned out my pantry of canned goods (with my permission) and still gives me a hard time when I have things in there for too long without using them because there are people without food. She is extremely mature for her age, and her larger than life heart brings tears to my eyes. My point is that Reagan doesn't take serious information lightly.

About two months ago Reagan came home with a free pass to Six Flags that she had gotten for completing a reading challenge at school. She had never been there, and she was ecstatic! She grabbed the calendar off the refrigerator, sat down at the table and called me over. Reagan is no dummy, she wanted to mark a date for her and I to go to Great America this summer. I knew I'd have to tell her about the surgery eventually, and the time had come.

This wasn't going to be easy. My mom had brain surgery three years ago, during which she suffered two strokes. She didn't wake up for days, couldn't talk, walk, or do anything for weeks, months...she had to relearn everything. She has come SO FAR now, but she is still disabled. It was extremely hard on Reagan; they are so close and Reagan struggled deeply through the initial loss of her grandma; she didn't come home for a year and a half after the surgery. We would go visit her in the hospital and then nursing home, and Reagan was so strong through it all. But to ask that of her again with her own mom would be too much.

I started by bringing up all the headaches I always have, and the doctor appointments, pills, etc. I told her that the doctors were going to make me better, but I'd have to be in the hospital for a few days and have a surgery. She asked if it was brain surgery. I told her yes. Her entire face went into a frown, her eyes pleading no as they filled with tears, but no words came out. I ran to her side and took her face in my hands, looked her in the eyes and said, "No, no, no. You have nothing, nothing to worry about. This time will be different. I will be fine, they will fix me and nothing bad will happen, I promise you. I would never do this if there was a chance anything bad would happen, I promise you Reagan. You can trust me. You know you can trust me. You believe me, right?" She took a deep breath and said "ok." She seemed relieved. I hugged her and held her and and continued to reassure her, while at the same time I knew I was reassuring myself.

Reagan is still very worried about the surgery and needs constant reassurance, which we all give her. She also tries not to show how upset she is (she turns her head to cry or leaves the room). I tell her it is okay to be afraid and upset, but that I will be okay, and that before she knows it, it will be over and we'll be enjoying our summer. And we are definitely going to Six Flags sometime soon, only her dad will be going on the rides with her while Charlie and I hang out and watch :)

All clear

I had my appointment today with the cardiologist. Charlie came with me, he didn't particularly enjoy watching them hook me up to the EKG machine, which I could tell because he came over to me and started playing with my hair. I reminded him that they were just going to do a test on my heart, and that it wouldn't hurt at all, maybe just tickle a tiny bit (you actually don't feel a thing, and it takes like 5 seconds once they finally get it all hooked up, but the stickers and clips look rather intimidating).

The results came out the same, but after doing an exam the doctor concluded that the premature ventricular contractions (PVC's) may at worse be a sign of mitral valve prolapse, but pose no risk for the surgery and gave me clearance. I do need to follow up with him in the future to keep my heart condition in check though, ugh.

I can't say I was completely relieved about getting the go ahead for the surgery...as it gets closer, I'm starting to freak out a bit. I'm sure that's normal, and I do want to get it done and over with, but with it being only five days away, I kind of wish I had more time. I've been feeling so well since the injections and vacation to Jamaica, I wish I could just feel like this a little longer, because I know that come Monday when I wake up, I'm going to feel AWFUL. The recovery is going to be really tough, my doctor and nurse have prepared me for this, and I'm dreading it. In the long run, if it works, it will be so worth it, but right now, I wish I could enjoy some more of the summer with the kids. Reagan isn't even out of school yet; her last day is tomorrow. We get one day together, then the weekend, and that's it, and I just wish we had more time. She's be so mature about going to school everyday knowing I'm home with Charlie (I've been off for 2 weeks), and I feel bad that this is how her summer is starting off. But, on a more positive note, getting back into my summer routine with the kids, going to the pool and the park and their sporting events will motivate me to get better as quickly as possible. My goal will be to miss as little as possible. I'm sure I'll get frustrated, but at the same time, their precious little faces and smiles of encouragement will keep me going :)